My thoughts on a few things

Dear Poison Control- Thank you for existing. Thank you for not making me feel like a complete tool for having to call and tell you that my child played in rat poison while I was not looking. Thank you for warning me when you explained the slow painful death of a rat who has consumed such poison and then reassuring me over and over that my son would be just fine.

Dear Highlander- I miss you. Blast the poor tired guy who fell asleep at 1:00 in the afternoon and destroyed you. I didn't know how much I loved you until you were gone.

Dear Used Car Sales Men- (Men, because I have yet to find a girl at one of these places)- How do I know if you are being honest? You all tell me something different and then confuse me and give me headaches.

Dear Mini-Van Drivers- Did you feel like your youth was sucked out of you when you decided to buy one of these glorious F.U.V.'s ( thats fun utility vehicle)? I love the practicality, I love the space, I loath the feeling of "Maturity" that comes with me driving one.

Dear BYU students- Why do you look like babies? Why do I suddenly feel like if I were walking around campus I would not blend in anymore or even pass for a student? Why did it take me this long to realize that I am old? ( And this is without driving a Van yet!?)

Dear Laundry- I thought we made up and were friends. What happened. I would like that sock and my life back please.

Dear Marty- Why are you so cute? What did you do with my baby? Besides doing baby things like play with poison, you are really turning into a little man! Love it. Fear it. Trying to Embrace it.

Dear PC- I hope you didn't take it personal when I kicked you out of the living room and put your in my bedroom. You and I had an unhealthy relationship. While it was fun while it lasted, I desperately need the time you were sucking from my life. People will still blog whether I am reading about it or not and my family enjoys having me back.

Dear Life- I love you.